the crone

opening the door to ideas

Apprentice fever has hit our house again. I hate it (well, I love to hate it). It’s a guilty pleasure. Jeering at the candidates’ mistakes that all seem so obvious from the safety of your sofa, arguing with Lord Sugarpuff’s boardroom decisions and deriding the outrageously scripted puns. But once again what strikes me is how horribly uncooperative …

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I’ve been talking to another blogger fourhillsfarm64 about the legacy of being a child who has grown up and lived with the long-term disease and death of a parent (or loved one). I’ve covered some of my own thoughts and experiences on this in previous posts. The outside calm and the inside crying My father was disabled and horribly ill for most of my …

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So I’ve brought up both of my children up to be individuals. To celebrate that everyone is different. To understand that being unique is something to take pride in. My son is very different to most 10 year old boys. Not because he has Aspergers Syndrome or Autistic Spectrum Disorder … he really is quite eccentric. His …

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I went to see my daughter perform in The Mikado on Saturday. It was great to see her on stage. Poised. Confident. Having fun. Part of a really quite ambitious school production. She was one of the Japanese maidens, and to see her singing in the chorus was just lovely. It’s hard to remember now how …

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Sometimes I cook fancy things. I chop. I peel. I cut. I knead. I slice. I season. I go on long convoluted shopping trips in order to track down 60 separate secret ingredients for Sambal, Bun Bo Xao and Garam Masala. But fussy people do not want this. They demand Macaroni Cheese. They care not …

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Why do we become who we become? I puzzle over this a lot. Fixated that I could’ve been better, done better, achieved more, ‘if only’, ‘if only’, ‘if only…’ Who were you supposed to be? Apparently, who we become isn’t just a matter of nature or nurture. For instance, murderers and psychopaths are both born …

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Three young artists diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis were given a brief — to create something good out of something bad. The one above I thought was beautiful and thought-provoking. The birds look longingly into the sky; maybe they feel grounded? Are they thinking they will never fly again? Do they miss their wings? Whatever has happened to their bodies, they are …

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We were asked to donate a nearly-new cuddly toy to my boy’s school to raise funds in the Christmas raffle. My son decided to give away one of his precious teddies. The teddies of all shapes and sizes (and species) jumble together in a seemingly random heap, next to his pillow in bed. However, they apparently have a strict ranking and …

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Today. Alone. Having time and space to myself at last. Ignoring the washing, the cleaning, the housework. Wasting time carefully, with a range of activities chosen for myself, me, only. Segmenting the day into fizzling an hour away on social networking, an hour on news reading, and hour on novel reading, an hour on showering, …

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Talking with a friend. I realised that life is a series of flaky compromises — a bit like a bland baklava. What’s For Afters? Dirty pan, mucky plates Not wiped clean In a mess Smelly, sticky, ugly to see Cold, coagulated vomitus Thrown up and thrown away Half munched, half crunched Chewed knobs of gristle, …

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