A muscular fist punches a hole through my chest.Why so scared? Why so scared? Why do you always want to be missed out, skipped over, anonymous? Why make choices that no one will ever see, comment on or know? Here I am still trying to break my arm in The Door rather than speak. I slam myself …
When did magic die for you? I always believed in magic. I mean, really believed in it. Aged 9 I thought if I wished hard enough my cat would talk to me. That he was only hiding his secret self behind his impassive cat face because he could not trust a human. Could never trust a human, not even …
My cat Jinx was found dead about 2 weeks ago. He loved being brushed, and I tweeted about collecting his fur in a pot, joking that ‘I could make another cat’. Not such a joke now. But I used his fur to make the Heart of Jinx. Then I made a cuddly Jinx out of …
There’s a cat-shaped hole in our house tonight.
Sinking. That’s what I’ve been doing. Not writing. Not running. Not working. Not looking after myself. I’ve had long blank months where I could have written that novel/children’s story/poetry/comedy script/blog. And yet I do nothing. Except sink. The more I feel I *should* do something constructive, the more useless I feel. I’m drowning. I might thrash and …
I’ve been researching the rise of ‘Pauper funerals’ in the UK. Also called Section 46 funerals, these are burials that are paid for by the local authority when someone dies alone, with no known next of kin. What struck me as I read through case studies, watched news articles and looked up Gazette postings, is that when …
I’ve been talking to another blogger fourhillsfarm64 about the legacy of being a child who has grown up and lived with the long-term disease and death of a parent (or loved one). I’ve covered some of my own thoughts and experiences on this in previous posts. The outside calm and the inside crying My father was disabled and horribly ill for most of my …
So I’ve brought up both of my children up to be individuals. To celebrate that everyone is different. To understand that being unique is something to take pride in. My son is very different to most 10 year old boys. Not because he has Aspergers Syndrome or Autistic Spectrum Disorder … he really is quite eccentric. His …
Now I’ve moved house, I’m trying to get back on track with my health and fitness. (Mmmm, just seeing the word ‘track’ makes me think of a delicious nutty treat…) I don’t need it. I think I am obsessed with food. Having a wobble So my week pans (…mmm crispy fried bacon) out like …
Did you read this story? See Homeless ex-pianist dies So many questions I’d like to ask Anne. Why would an obviously gifted woman choose a life on the edge? Living in a car (or on a railway embankment) must have been tough and uncomfortable. What words could’ve persuaded her to come back to ‘normal’ life? What is ‘normal’ life, anyway? Why …
the crone 